November 14, 2008

"The perfect smackdown": "Is Barack Obama white?"



IN THE COMMENTS: Bissage said:

I remember vividly the time I was carrying my books, walking to summer school, when some bullies threatened to beat me up.

I countered with the perfect smackdown: "Oh yeah? Is Gerald Ford a cocksucking little faggot?"

I spent that summer in a wheelchair.

29 comments:

Bissage said...

I remember vividly the time I was carrying my books, walking to summer school, when some bullies threatened to beat me up.

I countered with the perfect smackdown: "Oh yeah? Is Gerald Ford a cocksucking little faggot?"

I spent that summer in a wheelchair.

Anonymous said...

""The perfect smackdown": "Is Barack Obama white?""

The perfect comeback: "Yo, that niggas half White and full blood Uncle Tom who aint done shit for me and mine. Take that weak shit out my face nigga".

To be a successful black in America it does help to have a White mother and be raised by upper middle class White people. And birth rates being what they are blacks born of White women will become an increasingly large part of black middle/upper middle class America.

A very high percentage of blacks at Harvard are actually mixed race or African or Caribbean.

Obama Jr and Obama Sr are examples of that.

dbp said...

The perfect smackdown? No. We already had Rice, Powell and Thomas; It was already clearly obvious that African Americans could reach the highest levels of power in our country.

Geoff Matthews said...

Clarence Thomas is more black than Obama, but the black community extended him little respect.

lowercase said...

I agree with John McWhorter. It'll make a huge difference especially with kids who are about 7 today and will likely reach 16 by the time Obama is out - with their first images of authority and the world being formed with Obama as President.

The big changes never really take root until the next generation. Just as Obama himself is the result of the changes from the Civil Rights era, there will be results from the Obama Era that won't be fully realized until they hit 40-something.

And gender is an even deeper root issue being globally manifest in every nation and culture in nearly every time period. Identity isn't a superficial issue yet, it is still very deep. I simply would have preferred that women/girls be getting the same benefit that Obama will bring. And they won't be - and that pisses me off.

Republican said...

More importantly:

Why isn't Bill Clinton black (anymore)?

DaLawGiver said...

Quien es mas negro, Al Sharpton, Will Smith, o Obama?

Quien es mas blanco, Nancy Pelosi, Brad Pitt, o Jose Biden?

Balfegor said...

The perfect smackdown? No. We already had Rice, Powell and Thomas; It was already clearly obvious that African Americans could reach the highest levels of power in our country.

Out of Rice, Powell, Thomas, and Obama, though, only Thomas and Rice really come from what I think most people conceive of as the archetypal "Black" experience, i.e. they are descended from American slaves and grew up in African-American communities. Obama, of course, is the son of a Kenyan and was raised by Whites. And Powell's parents, if I recall correctly, were Jamaican.

lowercase said...

I also agree with jdeeripper in a sense - this will also mark the beginning of a real class divide in the AA community. Just like the white upper levels are proportionately, but not exclusively, more blonde, there are relatively more light-skinned black or multi-racial people in that strata as well. As the racial issue recedes more and more, the class divide will be what is left.

Republican said...

How many did not vote Mr. Obama because he is half-white?

Meade said...

"Obama, of course, is the son of a Kenyan and was raised by Whites."

That would be the perfect counter-smackdown to the perfect smackdown, the counter to which would be: "And just how did you know that? From reading books, right?"

To which the perfect counter-counter-counter-smackdown would be:

"Sheeeit, no, mofo! I googled it. Chump!"

Unknown said...

Jeez, your jive dialects are so 20th century.

Peter Hoh said...

Ta-Nehisi Coates addressed this on his blog a couple of days ago.

John McWhorter gives advice to nascent black nerds...specifically on how to get punched in the face at record speed

Coates highlights a reader's comment: A Black nerd, like any other nerd, has a backpack full of books. In 2nd grade I pulled a Falling Down at my bus stop, swinging my back pack around and was never messed with again.

Peter Hoh said...

republican asked: How many did not vote Mr. Obama because he is half-white?

I ran across a YouTube video in which a black man was saying that Obama doesn't count as an African American because his mother was white (and a Democrat, too) and his father was an African immigrant. In his view, Obama is not of the group that endured slavery, but of the group that carried out and perpetuated slavery.

As proof that he really didn't have anything against white people, he volunteered that the mother of his children was white.

Meade said...

"Jeez, your jive dialects are so 20th century."

Oh yeah? Well, is Uncle Remus 21st century?

former law student said...

Only people with the strongest sense of self can withstand being called "Urkel" or "Poindexter."

McWhorter reminded me of this great Al Yankovic song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-xEzGIuY7kw

Jarz said...

"Clarence Thomas is more black than Obama, but the black community extended him little respect."

Clarence Thomas is more genetically black, but Obama is perceived as being more of an African American in a cultural sense. He has spent almost his entire adult life enmeshing himself in AA cultural life, e.g his church, his community organizing, his neighborhood (Hyde Park is the closest thing Chicago has to an upscale black neighborhood), and his wife.

And on that last point, to be a bit crude about it, many in the black community (esp. women) notice that in genetic terms, Obama's children are "more black" than Thomas's (if he has any).

road warrior said...

I think i am staying out of this one, i don't want the illuminati to come after me and break my legs or put me in a wheelchair.

Speaking of wheelchairs : bissage's comment was about he funniest thing i have ever read on a blog.

"Oh yea? is gerald ford a cocksucking little faggot?"

I don't even know what that means but i can't stop laughing!

JamesR said...

Would Obama be classified as a "Half-Rican American?"

I overheard some (Obama supporting) teenagers jokingly use that term when discussing him, about a week before the election.

Wince said...

I don't care what the black mun say, Bob Marley is a white mun.

Trooper York said...

Well his ghost is definitely white.

And it only shows up on Christmas
Eve.

Anonymous said...

PJ said...I agree with John McWhorter. It'll make a huge difference especially with kids who are about 7 today and will likely reach 16 by the time Obama is out - with their first images of authority and the world being formed with Obama as President.

In that sense Obama is like Tiger Woods. After Woods won the PGA Masters 11 years ago it set in motion the now near total black domination of the PGA tour.

Woods has inspired millions of American blacks to forgo interest in basketball and make golf more than simply a hobby, it's now a way of life.

It took awhile but now 11 years from that historic history making moment of black historical world history it's safe to say Woods' historic impact has made playing and watching golf a major part of black America. Especially among the urban youth.

I expect the same impact from Obama's historic, history making historicification of political historicity.

Bushman of the Kohlrabi said...

White is the new black?

Alexander Wolfe said...

Coates does it better:

Nascent Black Nerd: [References some obscure episode of Battlestar Gallatica]

Daytwon: Son, why you always watching that white shit?

Nascent Black Nerd: Is Barack Obama white??

Daytwon: Baracka-these-nuts nigga!!!


http://ta-nehisicoates.theatlantic.com/archives/2008/11/john_mcwhorter_gives_advice_to_nascent_black_nerds.php

Alexander Wolfe said...

I'm just curious...are any of the commentators in this highly enlightening discussion (see the satirical comments about black domination of the PGA) about race actually black? I'm genuinely curious.

Geoff Matthews said...

FWIW, I'm as white as a Norwegian raised in Sweden (I'm neither, but you get the picture). I'm as pale as a Canuck in Utah.

And the reason I stated that Thomas is blacker than Obama is that he was raised by black people and he grew up around more black people than Obama did.

Obama's community organizing strikes me a 'slumming'. He never understood the awfulness of the ghetto while growing up, so it had some romantic notion to him. I don't blame Thomas for getting out when he could. The litany of social problems that slosh around in these areas? I'd not want to raise my kids in them.

And you'll notice where Obama raised his own children.

ddh said...

I can buy that Obama will have a beneficial influence on African American culture if he's successful as president. My question is, what happens if he turns out to be the second coming of Jimmy Carter--that is, widely seen as a failure?

Geoff Matthews said...

ddh,

Do you think that Carter's presidency had a negative impact on the self esteem of southern peanut farmers?

ddh said...

Geoff,

McWhorter's point is that Obama's election will have symbolic benefits for African Americans. I'd like to know whether those benefits depend on the success of an Obama presidency.

Southern farmers never referred to reading books as "acting urban."