April 29, 2009

What to do about flu?

Change the name!

ADDED: Pork producers are awfully antsy, aren't they? It's not as though anyone says "We're having swine for dinner."

Swine, the other white meat.

37 comments:

jayne_cobb said...

Hey, it worked for terrorism.

jayne_cobb said...

Sorry, I meant man caused disasters

AlgonquinS said...

Phlew.

Anonymous said...

Another pig-caused disaster.

The River Otter said...

People are going to have misconceptions regardless of what it is called. Anyway, Swine Flu's agent should have thought of this before it hit the big time, right? Can't change it now!

Freeman Hunt said...

We could give them names like hurricanes. Any names that could substitute well for swine?

Jason (the commenter) said...

I'm sorry but "H1N1 virus" isn't as twitterable as "swine flu".

Anonymous said...

Drudge links to a report that the Russians are banning American beef because of the outbreak.

Perhaps the DHS should move to call it H1N1 Non-bovine Flu to help the cattle industry.

Wince said...

Wasn't there a "Killer Bees" sketch on SNL where Belushi, as a Killer Bee, said "Swine Flu saved my life in 'Nam!"

1970s here we come!

Jason (the commenter) said...

We could give them names like hurricanes.

With the government taking over banks and automobile companies, maybe they could use some of the brand names that are no loner needed. First Bank of Idaho Flu anyone?

"I think I have IndyMac fever!"

rhhardin said...

Call it soybean flu to get Americans eating meat again.

cryptical said...

I guess it'd be racist to call it Mexican Flu.

They called the 1918 variant Spanish Flu, right?

TMink said...

No country but the US routinely does the work to correctly identify and track flu strains. Mexico is not sure what they have going on down there. They even identify flu related deaths differently than we do.

Trey

Joseph said...

Go vegan!

Kevin said...

Well, calling it "North American Influenza" is stupid, and calling it "The Mexican Flu" is racist.

To please everyone, please refer to it as "The Evil Gringo Flu".

Balfegor said...

It's not as though anyone says "We're having swine for dinner."

That's why I love German. Schweinefleisch. "Swineflesh." It just grosses English speakers out.

MadisonMan said...

How about Republican Flu?

Fox News can call it Democrat Flu.

campy said...

"We Will Sell No Swine Before Its Time."

Bissage said...

Evil cat to Babe: "They call you . . . pork."

Curtiss said...

Smithfield Flu

Or a longer version: Lapdog of the Imperialist Capitalist Pig Flu.

traditionalguy said...

The Great Flu Panic is just another scared-you-good crisis used by our "world leaders" to showcase their Powers of life and death over our lives. No one dares to mention that this flu is just another mild strain that is less deadly than most flu we live with. But that's not a good enough story, is it. Just IMAGINE how bad it could be if it actually was a deadly flu pandemic! We are being ruled by the power of false suggestion. Many Scientists have become willing accomplices, so they can appear as important heroes, in the Science Fiction stories du jour.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Michael Haz said...

My preference would be to all it Arlen Specter. That guy makes me want to puke.

Or maybe the Tequila Flu. Similar symptoms.

Anonymous said...

These joint-agency solutions must be a new invention of a highly evolved administrative approach.

DHS and Department of Commerce working together to both solve a world health problem, and a US producer marketing problem.

With the government now owning the US car companies, I’m sure it won’t be long before we'll have joint DHS, DOC, & GM marketing department solutions, such as naming a virus the Lexus-BMW Flu, to help dampen world demand for US car competitors.

Unknown said...

Ants have never gotten over the stigma caused by the terms "antsy" and "ants in the pants." In fact, that's why fire ants bite.

The Dude said...

Name it after Obama - it happened on his watch. From now on it shall be known as "Pussy Flu".

Cedarford said...

THe Russians know it isn't communicated by meat products. They are just sticking it to us on trade, much as the Japs did on beef when mad cow scares started, and much as we stuck it to the Canadians on beef when they had a few cases.

My suggestion is that AIPAC extend their clout down to Mexico. If they can subvert US politicians far and wide, Mexico's should be a cinch.
Have the Mexicans, with big fat packages of cash delivered, name it the "Ahmadinejad Flu".
Get the pork producers to chip in for the bribes.

Ben (The Tiger in Exile) said...

Better tactic:

"Take revenge on those evil swines. Eat more pork!"

Banshee said...

Political hostesses in Washington DC often have swine for dinner.

Sigivald said...

Swineflesh is delicious.

Cedarford said...

Fucking Muslims never miss a beat to further oppress their "filthy infidel" minorities. The Islamazoids are using the flu scare as pretext to "purify" Egypt of the pigs Christians there raise for food. Kill every one of them.

CAIRO (AP) - Egypt began slaughtering the roughly 300,000 pigs in the country Wednesday as a precautionary measure against the spread of swine flu even though no cases have been reported here yet, the Health Ministry said.
The move immediately provoked resistance from pig farmers. At one large pig farming center just north of Cairo, farmers refused to cooperate with Health Ministry workers who came to slaughter the animals and the workers left without carrying out the government order.

"It has been decided to immediately start slaughtering all the pigs in Egypt using the full capacity of the country's slaughterhouses," Health Minister Hatem el-Gabaly told reporters after a Cabinet meeting with President Hosni Mubarak.

Egypt's overwhelmingly Muslim population does not eat pork due to religious restrictions. But the animals are raised and consumed by the Christian minority, which some estimates put at 10 percent of the population.

Health Ministry spokesman Abdel Rahman estimated there were between 300,000-350,000 pigs in Egypt.

Agriculture Minister Amin Abaza told reporters that farmers would be allowed to sell the pork meat so there would be no need for compensation.

Joe said...

Let's call it "Politician Flu" instead of swine flu. It's important not to slander a noble breed.

Balfegor said...

Swineflesh is delicious.

Indeed it is. Schmeckt sehr gut indeed.

BJM said...

What if this flu outbreak is a test?

I know, I know, way paranoid, but one can't help but wonder that the global response has quickly gone to Defcon 4 with a ridiculously small number of cases for an easily identified, treatable disease.

What aren't they telling us?

Just sayin'.

Balfegor said...

ridiculously small number of cases for an easily identified, treatable disease.

Well, its mortality rate is (at least judging from what we hear from Mexico) orders of magnitude higher than ordinary flu (although that may just be because there's a hidden tail of infected people with only very mild symptoms). And because its apparently hitting healthy young people hard, like Spanish flu and so on.

And how treatable is it, really, if it becomes widespread? I heard that Tamiflu works, but back in 2005, when we were stockpiling it for Avian flu we had only 2 million doses for 300 million people. I understand the government has made a big push towards building up those reserves in the last four years, but do we actually have sufficient reserves? I'd be surprised if we have.

kentuckyliz said...

Yeah, on some news website combox, a Muslim said, it won't come to Muslim countries, because pigs aren't halal, so Muslims won't get the swine flu.

Idiot. You don't get it from eating pigs, it spreads person to person.

If God didn't want us to eat pigs, he wouldn't have made them so tasty.

If we want to nick this flu something that Mexicans eat and we don't, so our ag lobby is happy, let's call it the GUINEA PIG flu.

BJM said...

Balfegor, have you ever lived in Mexico City? The Zona Rosa & Polanco is a 1st world core surrounded by a teeming 2nd and 3rd world city.

One forgets that more than 20 million inhabitants squeeze into an area the size of the LA basin. So any communicable disease will result in a rapid spread. Annually Mexico City reports more than a million cases of respiratory complications caused by air pollution alone.

Millions of the underclasses in Mexico City come from poor provinces where there is little to no regular health care. To add to the problem they have the barest awareness of the relationship of hygiene to disease or illness. That and substandard sanitation in the poor colonias result in 250,000 cases of Diarrhea reported annually. So, no I'm not surprised with the number of swine flu cases or complications, they are probably low given circumstances.

According to the CDC the US has approx 36,000 flu deaths annually. Why didn't we have all this pandemic strum & drung during the winter flu season when it spreads rapidly across the country and world.

Something isn't kosher here.